What is Your Story?

Posted on March 21, 2022 by Ana Spano under Inspiring, Motivation, Self-development, self-help, well-being, Wellness

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“Stories are a communal currency of humanity,”—Tahir Shah

As I scour the plentiful social media outlets, the endless headlines, negative and positive, I can not help but wonder: what is the behind story of that individual whose name is being plastered all over the news? I have written in the past, about knowing people’s backstory before placing judgment, (although judgment gets you nowhere and must never be part of your practise), make assumptions, or downright feel we truly know someone in any given scenario. I am not suggesting that knowing someone’s story will change a negative outcome and spin it to a positive, but it will certainly change your perspective and offer a better understanding of where something may have gone wrong. The perception of the act will certainly be altered; the act will remain a negative but, in my opinion, the back story always offers an opportunity for forgiveness.

Hello my beautiful souls! February flew by, my Christmas tree is down and out! I took my Christmas tree down in February when I initially started writing this post. It was my intent to post this article in February but life happens…. I experienced a painful moment in life—the loss of my little furry friend of 16 years. She was the life of our home, always, getting our attention whenever possible. She was energetic, playful and boy did she love her food. She was petite, and was a perfect esthetic match to our home, her colors flowed beautifully in our home with a pinch of strawberry blonde near her floppy ears. We miss her dearly. My heart aches where her little paw once rested. It is hard to believe that our house is left with such a large void, an emptiness brought on from a painful loss of such a little bundle. But life is like that, it offers moments of joys, highs, and lows, we just need to be present every moment, ensuring to take it all in. Her departure was quick, no suffering. The last few months before her demise, I especially paid attention to her cues in what she wanted, when she wanted a hug, a cuddle, playtime, or we simply stared into each other’s souls quietly. I am grateful to have experienced being a #DOGMOM, it truly taught me to appreciate these furry little creatures; I often refer to as: Martians—they are so sweet and lovable!

When I initially set out to write this article, it was my intent to start by saying farewell to the Christmas cheer while taking every moment in—no rush. Why is everyone in a rush to move to the next event—savor every moment, every minute—life is gorgeous, it is not a race, it is meant to be enjoyed! But life, through a wrench, and instead I write about saying goodbye to my sweet furry friend. How fitting, to discuss moments; seasons in life, that should never be rushed. Cherish every moment, every second with loved ones—these are special gifts. For me, the Christmas spirit is not meant to be rushed—it is meant to be savored—a moment in life, I wish would last forever, so my tree stays for as long as I need it to. It is a memory in time, transporting me to when I was a little girl and my sister and I were newly arrived in Canada; imagine how wonderful, and joyful I felt at the age of six seeing this magnificent tree filled with Christmas presents right to the very top! It would be the first Christmas we would experience snow, cold, and truly be the centre of attention as my mom was the only one among her friends that had kids—her adult friends yearning to please two little girls, wishing they could experience Christmas through our innocent, joyful eyes! It would be every year after, that I would celebrate Christmas in the most wonderful, sweet, giving way, because of that very special first Christmas here in Canada back in 1975. You see, our stories, our experiences, tell a lot about why, we act, react, and do the things we do. Not all Christmas before or after could have been perfect, some may have been sad (because that’s life), but I choose to only remember the one that brought me joy and warmed my heart, and it will forever be the reason why I love celebrating Christmas so much! And I pass on this Christmas cheer to my girls.

Christmas is not the only reason why I am so full of spirit, I also enjoy music—all music, it is good for my soul! If I could, I would listen to music 24/7, but I have to think of my family—they would disown me if I had music playing on my magical Bose speaker; you see, for me, music is meant to be listened at a moderate volume, not through earbuds, instead have it fill a room, it is the purest form of art and meant to be appreciated by all listeners, engaging us in the most deepest ways, transcending us to a deeper emotional level—it is an important part of human existence. Music enriches our lives by connecting us to decades and even a century past—a treasured gift offering us the opportunity in the present to understand the past; unique sounds, melodies, ingeniously crafted that transcends the years, bonding us one beat at a time. The beauty of music is that everyone’s experience is different by the emotion conveyed by the singer, chords, the notes, the meaning of the song produce an emotion unique to the listener determined by our past experiences. A note, a melody, a lyric might transport you to a time in your life that makes you happy or sad; music is a direct expression of beauty; it can carry us through the darkest of nights bringing you tears of joy or tears of sadness it all depends on your perspective—your story, your past hurts, your joys. A single song can capture a meaningful moment in your life while it can be entirely meaningless until context is provided—the story behind the meaning of the song to you. A song can have many interesting interpretations until context is provided and can be appreciated for different reasons by different people, resulting in different experiences—and this is gorgeous! When I am seeking inspiration, I know I will find it in music.

If you ever have the opportunity of riding in my car with me, you will have to endure music from all eras; it is what gets my heart pumping! It is the coffee to my morning! Once you meet me, and you get my backstory you will then get a sense as to why I am so hyped for so many reasons, particularly why I appreciate and love Christmas and music so much. Sadly, we never get the opportunity to know even the slightest tidbit about someone when in passing, our lives are not meant to fit in a 3×5 cue card pasted on our foreheads, instead what we see are blank faces, wardrobes that may or may not appeal to us, occasionally we watch someone have a melt-down and wonder what happened? Where did it go wrong for them? Will it happen to me? But what is their story? Why did they falter? Every choice has a consequence. Every character a story. Success depends on the actions that we take, the intentions we set in motion. Our stories often shift our perceptions—allow it; shift, evolve and commit to your own growth.

It is fascinating knowing that not only music but even the slightest scent will transport you to another time when you were… (you fill in the blank). Again, this is part of your story. It is wonderful exploring your roots, understanding why you do certain things, or see certain actions, rituals, traditions in a certain way, maybe it is an ancestral thing—and that’s your story! Perhaps that is why I truly enjoy watching NFL football, I mean I am manically obsessed, and I love that my daughters are now sharing that love. We watch every game, dissect every play, every coach, every player, particularly all quarterbacks. So, it may not be fun watching football with us because we do not have one team that we particularly root for (not since Montana retired), but we seem to root for a lot of the underdog teams, quite possibly because we fall in love with their stories. Every game is filled with passion, emotion, and loads of excitement. For me, it is more than stats; when I look at a player, it is about heart. The dedication and focus these players bring to the sport is exhilarating—pure joy to watch! There are teams who have not made it to the Superbowl in quite some time, because of a “curse”, or a rivalry between players, coaches, owners, that has gone on before I was born! (I know that long!) When you are a neutral party as I am, watching football, I can understand why there are teams that play extra hard when up against certain teams (I mean it is a bloodbath out there.). At times, I may sway a certain way for a particular team to win because maybe they deserve the win, that shiny ring that lets them know all the sacrifice, all the defying odds, overcoming versatility, was all worth every sweat, blood, and tears! They show their passion, grit, emotion—they leave it all on the field—an all-deserving attitude, in my book is a winning team. Before that QBs greatness, there is sacrifice—a maniacal level of focus and commitment that is paid with emotion and true sacrifice. A spectator who simply watches the game looking out for their team might miss out on the meaning behind that “win” for an opposing team and simply get upset that their team “did not win”. I am here to tell you there is life after loss—your team has a chance again next year.

After seven rings, the man in the arena, may end a season in his life, and start a new story. Those of you who follow football know I am referring to. Tom Brady’s story is one full of adversity, hard work, extreme sacrifice, his hype focus in everything he does from training, personal and career is what makes him legendary. If you are not a fan of his, you just choose to see a player with horseshoes, loads of luck and annoyingly in the way of your team achieving ‘their greatness’. When you learn that his story is not about easy breaks, or first round picks, then you begin to really understand and appreciate, his level of hunger, and obsessive need to acquire that ring time and time again. Tom, has earned his place in that arena—no argument there. With NFL draft right around the corner, I am excited to watch and read about the new additions joining the NFL family, to observe their super strengths and get to know their stories that got them there. What was that journey like?

That is the magic of life, we are forever weaving beautiful stories, the complexity of life always allowing us to pivot where we must, giving our experiences meaning—forever intertwining—keeping our stories limitless as long as we feel the beat of our heart. But enough about football, as life had something planned for me for the month of February, I am a little late with my football analogy (so my apologies) but I chose to keep my work in progress, as our stories are essential in inviting people into our world, helping others understand our essence, what we are made of, why we think, why we do the things we do. Equally important are the places we visit, the rooms we think in, dream, create—they house our stories beautifully and although we change—these places remain keeping the memories of what once—alive! Our experiences shape us, we start one way, and then we learn that it is not how we wish to be seen, or how wish to be in this world—and so we change. The change, the pivot, then forms part of the greatness that is to come, what unfolds then becomes part of a legacy left behind—your story.

“Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.”—Henry Ford

I love finding out what makes people “tick”, just as much as what makes someone so giving, so gentle, showing kindness every opportunity, they get. I felt compelled to share the importance of knowing someone’s “story”, especially with the many strands of diversity felt in the world today some brought on by a very real pandemic raging from social issues, political divides, global/ environmental change, highlighting the more subtle challenges faced by families facing work-life challenges today as a result. The present pulse of this planet is not all painful, these circumstances nothing but opportunities for those in decision making positions to tap into creative ways removing some of the barriers, offering us the opportunity to come together to offer solutions. Education is the key to success. My philosophy is that we are all here for a purpose. With this understanding, this awareness, I hold no judgment to those pursuing a life and living it as they choose. In some cases, radical change is being made, directly and indirectly—some arguments irrelevant to the cause, but eh, in the spirit of protest I guess anything goes(?) I will fight for a cause, walk with you to help promote positive change in a manner that is pro-peace, pro-love, but I refuse to engage in activities that are ‘against’ something often promoting ‘hateful’ behaviour because to do so, is to engage in the very thing most protestors feel their fight is about, ultimately infringing on my peace and everyone involved. The key to a positive change, is education—to understand all issues as fully as possible. To fully understand is learning to listen. Learn to be comfortable with being uncomfortable. Don’t choose to remain—expand your vision, by allowing and accepting those who are different than you. What if we take the time to learn and listen to the story behind a positive or negative result? Educate yourself, see what history tells us happened 100 years ago. What was the result then? We must always strive for improvement, it is never about resisting change, it is always about moving forward with change in whatever form, keeping the safety and good health for the highest good of all. We must value ourselves, our loved ones, our communities, and we must do our part to protect what we work so hard to build, that includes our relationships—all is relevant—all form part of our story. It is only human to protect the lives of the ones we share. The stories we tell ourselves are in the present—the legacies we leave behind are a gift to future generations. If fear is what is keeping you from moving forward, then seek opportunities to expand your viewpoint. Invite healthy discussions that will assist in building trust and acceptance. The solution is not to go out into the world and show your worst face, your ignorance on any given topic, please tell me your worldly knowledge is not pinned to a 12×15” sign spewing fearful, negative and hateful messages, how is this a step forward for the good of any cause?

The word inspiration means: “in-spirit”. That is our purpose collectively: is to inspire or be inspired. If you are busy surfing social media, and it leaves you uninspired then, I am here to tell you that you are not using your time wisely or seeking the right inspiration. STOP feeling threatened by what others appear to be doing and START working on your own happily ever after. If you are feeling too afraid or perhaps your joy, your peace, have been taken away for reasons out of your control, learn to take small steps to start spinning your successful story. Here are some helpful hints that will help you start:

STOP looking at what others are doing or not doing. What do you want to do? What would you like to accomplish? Visualize it. Fantasize it with every fiber of your being (include, feelings, smell, touch). See it in your minds eye.
Meditate – calm the busy mind. Extremely helpful if suffering from anxiety or feeling overwhelmed. The idea is not so much as to “quiet” the mind, but become aware of your thoughts. The more you practise meditation, the more you slow down your thoughts enough and learn to become laser focus on things that matter.
- Also, practise visualization of the life you wish to lead through meditation and practise gratitude every morning and evening.
- By calming the mind, you will learn to better receive information, answers to your daily challenges—hence this will ease your frustration/anxiety.
Work on YOU – master your craft. If you do not know yet what that craft is, work on improving yourself, find a skill, learn something new—get your creative juices flowing. LOVE what you do and do what you LOVE. Be an inspiration by doing what you love.
Be a good listener. You will notice people are often giving us clues about their, likes, dislikes, their hurts, their joys—listen. Learn to be a better friend, parent, sibling, employee, employer, spouse—this can only be achieved by offering someone your devoted attention. Learning their story helps develop compassion offers us an opportunity to be inspired.
Introducing a new activity, a new routine might be just what you need to put the spark back in your eyes and beautiful mind!

My story is that I was once a #DOGMOM of a 12lb. Yorkshire terrier Maltese. My heart swells watching pet videos, because in loving my little ‘Buttercup’, I learned to appreciate the unconditional love pets give. I have compassion for others who are going through a loss of a pet or loved one because it is a painful experience. They are missed, they are loved. This is part of my story. My story also includes being a mom, a wife, a writer, a corporate professional, a friend, a daughter taking care of her aging mom, loving my friends; there are many strands you can pull, take apart, in many directions—one truth remains throughout—am I a good person? Am I kind? Am I loving? For me, the answer to all is yes, but there is always room for improvement!

In life, we may hold various positions professionally earning us a certain set of figures, we may hold many titles within our respective fields, we may also live in certain homes, lead a certain lifestyle, we have political views—but it does not define who we are. When a story resonates with the reader, listener, or spectator, when we add circumstances to context, and add these fillers to the stories we hear, it often offers the listener/observer that inspiration in whatever form they seek—a belief in our motives, characters, and capacity to reach the goals we set out to seek.

Stories are beautiful to our everyday life, we take great pride in living our stories, they are unique, they are ours, they are home to our hurts, our joys, our strengths, our struggles. As we go about life, we learn to appreciate our own stories, we embrace, we reflect, we love, we forgive, we get inspired, hopefully we offer inspiration along the way. When someone invites you in and shares their story, you must take it with great privilege, as you have been given an opportunity to understand that individual on a whole other level; an opportunity to inspire and be inspired, to love. Sharing our stories make us vulnerable, in that vulnerability comes great power. The key to our well-being, are the stories we tell ourselves, our interpretation of them, the perspectives of an optimistic life or one full of demise—which do you hold true for yourself? The key to a well-lived story; a well lived life is to find meaning in the progression from one event to the next. Happiness is the result in cognizing every experience is necessary for growth.

Our ultimate triumphs, our success in life is found in how we deal with our challenges—who we end up being reflects our experiences. The people we help along the way, the places we go, the homes we build, the everyday interactions we have all become part of our stories that form part of our memories. We must always remember that we must never give our power away—no man or woman has the power to dictate anything over you. Be proud, be wise, live the life that you feel you deserve, honor yourself—everyone has a story worth sharing. Whether it’s the Queen of England, the ultimate influencer, the greatest NFL player of all time or the awesome barista who manages to get your morning beverage on point every time—everyone has a story worth sharing. We just need to open ourselves up to receiving their interaction in our lives, in whatever form that may take.

It is with great urgency, that I share this message with you, to bring an awareness to the role we all play everyday in the lives of those whose path we cross daily. Life is a gift. We are here to interact with everyone, our paths for ever intertwining. Make the most of it, share great moments, compassion, empathy, keep learning not only from your daily experiences but from those you have the privilege to meet. Life is meant to be lived—you only get one, so be sure your story is messy, and ready to be told and shared with those who show great interest, with those who share compassion.

March is the month when spring officially begins; it is a month of new beginnings—often offering blasts of all seasons in one month to remind us of the seasons, and emotions past, while at the same time offer appreciation of the hopeful season; moments that soon turn to new experiences and memories ahead! My wish is that you enjoy the remainder of March and be sure to keep safe in everything you plan to do, keep in mind that you share the planet with others who may be vulnerable who may be hurting, who are defenceless in the face of the current temporary darkness and as you go about creating, sculpting, spinning your beautiful unique story, that you are mindful that NOT everyone is privilege to your story in the first five minutes of meeting you, but you certainly have so much to offer in the first five minutes of any encounter to simply be the best version of yourself and leave this planet a little better that you found it. Always remembering the importance of feeling joy and happiness in whatever you do!

Keep yourself vibrationally in tuned with who you are. How you think and how you view the world affects the story that will be told about your life. Ultimately you have control of your narrative—accept that it will not always be perfect; it will be messy in the middle—that is the best part—it is what makes you human! You get to make choices about how to clean it up, change it, design yourself a life you deserve, and by telling your story you learn to see the beauty in your own life! Write your beautiful script and live out each chapter by being present—always giving yourself the utmost unconditional love along the way! It is never about re-writing your story that will make you better, but how you view yourself and your limiting beliefs that will help the healing and keep you growing. A powerful story leads to a powerful successful life! You deserve to live a brilliant abundant life; be sure your story begins with how empowered you feel and are! Remember to stay humble and offer kindness, elevate everyone in your life, and those you have the opportunity and great privilege to meet today. Be the person you wish to meet—be an excellent example of a human. Offer much love to your family and friends, give love and more love always, including your loyal and faithful pets!

Until our next visit together, stay kind and true to yourself.

Celebrating the beautiful powerful you,

P.S. If you enjoyed this post, I would be incredibly grateful if you would help it spread by forwarding it to a friend or sharing it on Twitter or LinkedIn. I am now on IG, come join me there @anaspanowriter! Thank you!

Celebrate Life—Enjoy everything!

Posted on November 18, 2021 by Ana Spano under Inspiring, Motivation, Self-development, self-help, well-being, Wellness

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“Not how long, but how well you have lived is the main thing.”—Seneca

In life, we go through a series of seasons some dark some offering hope. We also have the privilege of experiencing the change in seasons. Are you a lover of the warmer seasons? Maybe you enjoy and worship the sun? or perhaps you are more of a snow worshiper embracing the cold and beauty of snowfall? The variations of seasons are a result of change in weather, ecology, and sunlight or lack thereof. Similarly, the seasons of our life experiences are also affected by the many changes we go through, brought on by our emotions, environment, affecting our many perspectives. We also celebrate the many festive seasons; some we love, some not so much—all offering us the opportunity to create lifelong memories. Success, however, is a season in our lives offering much reward inward and out. When we meet our goals in life, when we move ahead in our respective professional career paths, we certainly feel the need to celebrate and why not? we certainly earned it! It seems to me, for most, that is where the celebration ends. We celebrate our successes, our ‘rights’ in life but we forget to celebrate the little things, the everyday mundane, the everyday laughter, joys, love, beauty! Celebrate it all—this is living a purposeful life, seeing the beauty in everything. Each new day holds a wonderful new surprise for you, all you must do is be ready to receive it. It may not always come in the form of joy (or in the form you expect it), but it will certainly expand you and open your heart making room for more beauty.

Hello my beautiful souls! November has arrived bringing with it the spirit we all need as we head towards the most celebrated season of all: Christmas! It most certainly is my favorite time of the year! It is a time to reflect, to write in my journal of what was, what hopes I have for the New Year, and what gives me the most joy, my heart fills with love as I write what I am most grateful for while celebrating the highs and lows of a year gone by. I have many things to be grateful for, my family is priority of course, but I am extremely grateful for the friendships I have the great privilege to be in company with—they are a blessing in my life! The start of this month has been a moment of great reflection for me, and a moment of expressing gratitude; having had the good fortune of meeting up with my friends whenever possible, in a safe manner of course, to simply enjoy a good meal, a good laugh, excellent company; it certainly helps heal the soul!

Nothing gives me more pleasure than, spending time with dear friends whether for a small birthday lunch, or a simple brunch to catch up, or perhaps a couple’s night with two of my dearest oldest friends—my heart is filled knowing that I have such wonderful kind-hearted friends. I came across some beautiful quotes on friendships as I wrote this article, here is one by Paramahansa Yogananda: “There is a magnet in your heart that will attract true friends. That magnet is unselfishness, thinking of others first; when you learn to live for others, they will live for you.” These difficult times has shown me just how truly special my friends are; I am humbled in experiencing the fine balance of giving and receiving, sharing great love and support for one another, ready to lift each other up, to provide kindness and support during a time of healing, during a time of loneliness, a time of simply reaching out for company and warmth—I celebrate and value good friendships.

So, celebrate your achievements, applaud your triumphs, but be mindful that the most beautiful things in life are not associated with money or fame or the things we see with our physical eyes—but rather the sweet memories of the little moments in life that make us feel special, that make us feel love. I have made it a point in life to always be myself around others never compromising my authenticity. I love who I am, and every day I discover something new. Discovering who I am, is and has been the most important adventure of my life. I discover myself in the friendships I make, the relationships I have, the experiences I choose to participate in—I embrace it all! I celebrate my uniqueness, my true authentic being, flaws and all, I celebrate the challenges that come my way, by facing fear head-on and I have the humbleness of celebrating my failures, and imperfections, allowing me to appreciate the world with eyes wide-open—I open my heart and embrace all that it is, I become more compassionate of the world around me.

As we move from what was the most perfect fall weather here in Toronto, with its beautiful fall colors, bountiful harvest and warmth of the holiday and traditions, we now move to the “hustle and bustle” of the Christmas season and cheer, perhaps a quieter tone less hustle due to restrictions, but a bustle of a season no-less. There will be plenty to do, baking, decorating, wrapping, and spending time with our loved ones. Since the pandemic, I find that things have slowed down, which is a plus; yes, service is slower because of limited help and limited capacity (I hope everyone is conscious of this, so please be calm on your outings), but due to this down time, it has also made more time for family and if you are like me, I love having my little family at home with me, watching movies, ordering in, and just enjoying good conversations. Less “hustle” is better. I now decorate with purpose and intention—no rush, it is all about how I wish to decorate, how I wish to organize—I am no longer consumed with how fast it needs to get done. It is beautiful to go about life being deliberate with your intentions. Do you agree? I celebrate, my time and space, to be able to appreciate every thought, every movement—time is our most precious gift. There is no “right time” to start existing. There is no “right time” to learn the lessons that needed to be learned to create better futures—the right time is always the present. The pandemic may have brought a lot of dark moments to many, but it also brought moments of simplicity—slowing down time allowing us to truly appreciate every moment, every experience and everyone in it. I celebrate experiences, memories, and the precious time necessary to make them!

What the world needs to celebrate more of:

Celebrate FAMILY. Making memories is the best movie experience in life, the best past time, anyone could ask for. Yes, we all have our quirks, our differences, our highs and lows—make the most of it! LOVE is the key to everything! When you smother love to everything, it all falls into place and memories is the precious result. So, hug, call, virtual call, a loved one and let them know just home much you appreciate them in your life because in the end, family and love is all that matters.
Celebrate your TRIUMPHS and your LOSSES—everything is necessary to make who you are and where you want to be in life. Embrace darkness, embrace challenge, embrace change just keep moving. Losses and darkness are meant to be experienced for growth, just be sure to stay in awareness, shift, evolve and commit to your own growth—don’t live in regret, resentment, fear—know there is life after loss.
Celebrate ALL SEASONS; those we have the pleasure of enjoying outwardly by showcasing fabulous fashion wear, blessings, and good cheer, and the moments in life responsible for shifting our perspectives.
Celebrate KINDNESS. Every morning I get up, I wish kindness on this world. It is the magic that makes life, gentler, more enjoyable. It is wonderful to visit an establishment and receive a smile; a kind soul opening the door for me—it lets me know all is OK in their world and it is wonderful they are passing along that kind vibration on to me.
Celebrate PEACE. My wish for everyone is to experience peace always, it is always at the top of my prayers because it is everything to have peaceful moments in life. It is right up there with optimal health. I read somewhere that: the way to peace is through radical acceptance. Celebrating our differences is not only pivotal in our growth as humans but it helps us understand and learn to accept and co-operate with one another, reminding us how committed we are to progress and evolve as ONE in harmony. Peace is what I strive for in my personal life all day, every day. Having peace in my life; in my household, let’s me know I have the right partner in life, excellent children, a loving family—all is well in my world. I invite it always with open arms.
Celebrate GOOD FOOD. We should also add celebrate good conversations because where there is good food, good company always follows which invites good conversations. My daughter and I will search up new recipes and try one at least once a week. It is wonderful looking up our favorite chefs; some pros, some simply gifted following their passion and love for food, and we try to recreate these mouth-watering recipes in our little kitchen. Since the beginning of time, the sharing of food, has and always will be part of human history. “To break bread together,” captures the deliciousness that is food, that is as powerful to forge relationships, bury our sorrows and provoke nothing but good laughter.
Celebrate CULTURAL DIVERSITY. Enjoying good food, becomes even more delicious as we allow our palates to savor the wonderful flavors from many parts of the world. That is the beauty of living in Canada, there is so much culture to be savored. It is wonderful to have the opportunity to expand our knowledge and experience the diversity in cultures; to find out more about what we have in common rather than what separates us and to enjoy all the beauty in our differences as well! Understand, welcome and celebrate different traditions, beliefs, cultures, and histories—they help shape society.
Celebrate LOVE. There is something about this beautiful feeling that we generate, so profound, so intimate, so magical, letting us know that all is well in the world. There is no single way to practice love—every relationship has its uniqueness. When we experience LOVE, it is to have faith, and when we have faith, we learn to trust. To invite love into your world is to know GOD, to know Source, the Universe, to believe in something greater than you. And from this place of love, inspiration flows—allowing you to see a future without obstacles, trusting all will work out for you. When we LOVE our perspectives shift from a lack mentality to an abundant one, we begin to look for more wonderful things, more wonderful experiences—see the world the way it is meant to be, full of beauty.

As Tom Peter says: “Celebrate what you want to see more of.” Celebrate Life! If you believe in a higher good, Source, God, The Universe—ask yourself: why have we been put on this earth? Are we here to only feel fear, sorrow, losses and hide in a corner; to limit ourselves to what we want to see and feel in this world or are we here to experience the joys, to live life to the absolute fullest? We were given eyes, and senses to feel—see and feel the beauty in everything; like an artist respects every line, every detail, every curvature, so too, must you learn to see the beauty in everything you do, in everything you experience. You are the architect of your life, create all the beauty you wish to see in it; see and feel your way, attract that which you wish to see in your outer world.

It seems to me that most, sit on the side lines, looking through the window watching life go by, always looking through a lens, when you could be out there participating, taking the life and world around us, experiencing it wholeheartedly, being fully present in the excitement of creativity! Stop looking at the world, stop looking at life, through the lens of your life experiences—your old hurts, personality, and conditioning—this only keeps your world limited. Life has taught me that every situation, person, place, thing, in our lives may be seen through one of two lenses: fear or love. Which do you choose? Recognizing that nothing in your outer world must change to begin to see the life you wish to participate in—by simply changing your perception of what you are currently seeing, refocusing the lens of your inner world; learning to view life through the eyes of LOVE, you will begin to attract more of what you wish to see in your outer world. The lens of kindness and love are key to your future successes! I am a believer in kindness—I always offer it.

Since we are on the topic of kindness; to offer an update on my basement fiasco (Read my blog on the Path of Least Resistance): yes, kindness prevailed! The wonderful independent insurance adjuster, that took over my claim came through for me with loads of kindness. Everything has been approved, mold removal and all! I will trust that the restoration process will go well, and I will have my basement back in time for Christmas (fingers crossed)! I must trust and have faith because everything always works out for me. What did I do to shift my perspective? Although I suffered a significant setback, with damage to my basement, going through the headache of dealing with insurers, contractors, etc. I could have easily set myself further on a downward spiral for a series of events leading to more disappointment, instead, I contemplated, looked for kindness in everyone, looked for the good in every experience (even if it looked bleak at the time☹) and I allowed the flow, I did not allow worry or anger block my path of least resistance and all lead to a positive resolution! I stepped into the flow, allowed it to take me where it needed to, I took the path of least resistance, listened to my inner knowing, letting me know that all will be taken care of and I allowed the people that presented in my life resulting from this event; this experience, to do what they needed to do. For now, I may not understand the reason why this happened, but I don’t get caught up in the “why’s”, I am sure the answer will come to me, if not perhaps for my writing process and share with you my little miracles! Let’s celebrate a shift in perspective and most importantly let’s celebrate kindness!

I am beginning to appreciate the month of November a little more—as a Canadian, not really having any holidays to celebrate during this month; a quiet month sandwiched between Halloween and Thanksgiving celebrations and of course Christmas ahead—our final celebration of the year, November has quietly snuck up and has become a month of reflection. It is there to allow time to draw up lists for things that need to get done in the upcoming weeks, it allows me to journal and gather my thoughts, reflecting on gratitude of the months gone by, it also allows me to take a breather and simply be without any pressure. I will celebrate November as a month to get my thoughts together, enjoy activities with purpose that will allow me to be purposeful in my actions and be more present in enjoying the season ahead. Thank you, November, I celebrate you and welcome you with open arms!

As you embrace November, and you work on wrapping things up for the year, and as you safely go out shopping or gather with friends to celebrate the season, take in life with a different perspective—live it intentionally! It is wonderful to celebrate the seasons gone by but be present in everything you do—the now is all that is available to you—trust that everything happens for you, that it happens in a timely manner and learn to enjoy the synchronicities in life happening for you in the highest good.

As Christmas closes in, my wish for you is that you embrace the weeks ahead with good cheer, no stress, no worries, just the simple feeling of love in your heart and have fun at it because that is what life is meant for! To enjoy everything, to celebrate every moment, help each other out, and have loads and loads of fun! I sit here on my kitchen counter, writing, hoping you will enjoy reading the tidbits I share from my journey, while enjoying the Christmas music in the background because it warms my heart, it inspires me, and I celebrate Christmas music/songs in every language. Say goodbye to seasons past, old hurts and never lose your sense of adventure, discover new ways to view the beauty of our everyday life experiences those we share with our families, friends, strangers and most importantly those we share with ourselves, while discovering who we are. So, dance, laugh, enjoy the deliciousness that is food, that is love, and go out there and share your best self with the world. As the song says: “Give Love On Christmas Day.” Except, find it in your heart to give LOVE everyday—the world needs more love. Celebrate the beautiful wonderful you because you have a lot to celebrate for!

My wish is that you enjoy the remainder of November and the joyful season ahead! Be sure to be safe in everything you plan to do, but most importantly feel joy and happiness in whatever you do! Feel the spirit of the season with great amazing vibes!

Keep yourself vibrationally in tuned with who you are, always giving yourself the utmost unconditional love! You deserve to live a brilliant abundant life! Remember to stay humble and offer kindness, elevate everyone in your life, and those you have the opportunity and great privilege to meet today. Offer much love to your family and friends, give love and more love always, including your loyal and faithful pets!

Until our next visit together, stay kind and true to yourself.

Celebrating the beautiful powerful you always,

Align With Your Desires By Taking The Path Of Least Resistance And Focus On The Joy That Already Is!

Posted on October 15, 2021 by Ana Spano under Inspiring, Motivation, Self-development, self-help, well-being, Wellness

“If you have learnt enjoying life without purpose, like a flowing river, you have learnt the art of living.”—Girdhar Joshi

It takes discipline, focus, determination, commitment when you make the choice to take the road least taken or the road least traveled (whatever floats your boat). The road full of challenges with all its obstacles, rocky bumps, scrapes, delays, might make you think the reward is that much sweeter, so much more deserving, or is it? There is research that suggests that everything ‘takes the path of least resistance’ such as water, electricity, and yes humans. As humans we have many choices in life, many decisions to make that could forever alter our lives; do we take this path or that? From choosing our academic paths, our career choices, relationships, choices in our everyday environment from diet to what we choose to feed our minds. The question is: When is taking the path of least resistance—a good choice? One that will ease your already hectic and challenge-filled life?

Hello my beautiful souls! I hope you had a safe, wonderful, and fun-filled summer because you deserve it! As for me, still doing a lot of inner work, always learning; it is what keeps me humble. I learn from all experiences and from everyone I meet. It is wonderful to view life this way—never feeling, “I am more” than anyone. Sure, this pandemic is giving my soul a little beating, and that is because I care so much about the world, the people in it, that of course includes my family and friends. We are all in this together and knowing this makes it a little easier, very humbling to know that we are sharing this pain, this life-altering set-back with all those we have the enormous privilege of sharing this beautiful planet with; to know that one day soon we will get through this darkness and my wish is that we all come out: kinder, with a lot more clarity, wiser, stronger and a whole lot of humbleness. This current situation has certainly put a lot of things into perspective from understanding that we are NOT alone, that there is always someone willing to help, to learning to trust and rely on others in keeping each other safe and healthy with a whole lot of love—that is the bottom line. That we are on the planet together, sharing our failures and success, that each of us has a mission to help the other succeed. Money is wonderful to have, but love, support, a kind word, a helping hand certainly goes along further. As for me, I recovered from my nasty fall; if you haven’t yet read my July post: “The Classic Do-Over’ be sure to read the details there, the universe had additional challenges to add my way with a leaky basement that will cost me upwards of $20,000 in renovations, talk about adding salt to the wound! So, why is my riverbed; my path in life, turning out to be such a rocky terrain and not as smooth as I once perceived it to be, when I was in the flow, earning excellent income, getting all the green lights? Why is life insisting on throwing me these challenges when I am in the least mind-space to tackle such challenges, such rocky paths.

My entire being, the reason I am here today, my achievements till now, successes, have been a result of these key attributes:

Discipline
Focus
Dedication
Determination

If the above actions resonate with you, then you will agree the common thread is all about hard work. To succeed at life, you must have a formula that works for you, that keeps you aiming high to hit your goal, hit your target; the key is: aim at something. I have been in the work force since the young age of thirteen and it did not matter that I may have started flipping burgers or being a birthday hostess—my discipline, dedication, determination and focus to being the best at whatever job came my way, I made sure I walked through the doors that opened for me and gave my 1000% every time. I was always early when starting my shifts and when I arrived, I was deep into whatever work related tasks / challenge came my way, offering support, rolling up my sleeves and learning the ropes—there was nothing I could not learn. My attitude was never: “This is not my job, so I will not participate”, instead it was: “I will participate to make things easier for you and all involved that will help make the day better.” I had a: “I will learn everything attitude” and I was determined to teach myself no matter how many hours it took.

This discipline carried me through my entire career path in the corporate world that was my life for thirty years. While these attributes kept me moving, as I look through the lens of thirty years of wisdom and spiritual awareness, I have come to an understanding that those very same attributes clouded my path; my path to discovering my purpose and in some way acted as a resistance to what is rightfully mine—my power, my effortless flow of abundance. Whereas, working hard at what you aim, will certainly deliver success; I am discovering that getting out of my own way, and allowing that which I focus on, flow to me easily and freely with limited resistance, with minimal effort is just as fun and better welcomed in my current path. What do I mean? Well, my friends this is the lesson I learned while licking my wounds from that nasty fall of July 2021, and from the occurrences of my leaky basement. You see, when experiencing or going through a challenge in life, most will react in a negative way, and might take on a: “why always me” attitude which will then lead to more lessons needed to be learned and it could be several spirals downward, heartaches and headaches, before you get to your ‘a-ha’ moment and then the light bulb turns “on” and you say, “yes”, I get it. My awareness, brings forth clarity that all that I experience in life, was necessary for me to come to the same conclusion, the same success but I arrived a little later—but I arrived, nonetheless. And yes, we are taught that challenges are essential for growth, although some of you take it to next level; you aim too high to quickly without taking anything in, without appreciating the moments, appreciating the journey that may lead to some pricey lessons, and I am here to tell you that you can avoid all that suffering! Awareness is where it is at!

As I went through life, taking on all challenges, putting my best foot forward, climbing all the ladders that needed to be climbed—fast forward 40 years, I did what was expected of me. To learn, to work, to succeed, to make money, to make others, money. I did my job—I was the job. I AM NOT DEFINED BY MY POSITION, MY JOB, TITLES, etc. So, who am I? and what is my purpose? You see, when you start asking these questions, the beautiful attributes you spent your entire life living by, no longer hold meaning because you now ask yourself: Who was I doing all this for? This might especially hit home if you are working for someone else and you do not have your own business at the age of forty, fifty or even sixty. (And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that if your soul is happy.) And even then, the answer to who you are doing all this for? might still be an astonishing: “don’t know”. Maybe you were talked into doing it for many reasons not necessarily monetary, perhaps you had a vision you pursued at a very young age and family followed suit, so it became your family income, but was it about you? The purpose of this article is not to discourage you from pursuing your dreams, your goals—we need those to do life. That you have something along the way, that keeps you moving forward, learning lessons, keeping active but what I propose is: that when doing life that you do it from a space of inspiration, a space of humility, that you always continue learning, that you do it for you with the least resistance, that you might have fun along the way. I will say, I have always been an individual who was very much aware of my experiences as they happened, so whether negative or positive, I always kept my head up high, knowing I was learning from every experience—never taking the bad as a defeat, but as a period of growth and nurturing my soul. Looking back however, I will say I might have done better at getting out of my own way and allowing the flow when it came to making more money quicker and with ease. You see where I am going with this? If I am wired to thinking that everything I want comes with hard work, discipline, focus, determination—all the hard work, then money will flow in that same riverbed, hard flow, with many rubbles keeping the flow from being a smooth one with of course resistance along the way, from not accepting the path. This is the hard lesson I was learning this summer.

I was beating myself up, because I am currently switching careers and shifting to a more self-employed, entrepreneurial career path that is more of who I am. And although, yes, it is imperative, that as an entrepreneur you need the attributes I discussed above, and possibly more, to be successful, it should not come with the amount of stress that it does as when you are working for someone else. These attributes are a part of you and should not be used to define who you are, or where you fall on the Forbes line-up but more about discovering your path to your true self. When you are on a path of self-discovery, you should not be beating yourself up, instead you should be loving yourself, embracing all moments, loving every inch, embracing all the perfections and imperfections that make who you are in this vast wonderful planet! You see, while I had no reason to feel panicked for money, my mind (my ego) was feeding my brain old truths about how “I make money”, which is “work hard” and as I was not attending a place of work due to COVID and other reasons, it sure played a number on me, and blocked my path for financial wealth and continue the flow as it once did—easily and freely (except without the 12hr. shifts of course and the unappreciative boss)—this is how we resist the flow. Creating a mental path of lack, and need, which puts us on the hamster wheel of life; a repeated path of events that keep you trapped into thinking I need to do this to “get”, or I need to acquire this to be successful—this is the lie we feed ourselves, we feed our families. Instead, we need nothing…we simply need to be. To accept and allow opportunities as they come; and they come effortless, all you must do is think about what you desire. When are you most happy? What fills you? Inspiration is the vehicle that drives all possibilities transforming the way we perceive our own capabilities. An openness to experience, mastering whatever small gifts you hold (and we all do), living an inspired life, will only thrust you to your desired life, awakening your soul, that only being ‘in the flow’ allows—no resistance. When living in this flow, it only leads to happiness.

So here is my discovery, I mentioned earlier that in addition to my nasty fall earlier this year, I also had to go through this set-back of experiencing a leaky basement. No, it was not a flood, just a leak in one of the pipes that had burst but not in the normal standard, burst-pipe flooding way, but a “burst” resulting in a small leak-kind of way. This time around, I decided to call on my insurance, because why not—that is why they are there to give me a piece of mind, right? The answer to that is a big fat NO! Apparently, insurers have their ‘wording’ they look for when accepting or denying liability, that IF a contractor’s description of causation (literally play on words) to describe cause of damage, does not fall under the wording of the policy—it gets denied! Can you believe that? I have had my share of dealing with all sorts of insurers when representing clients in the past in assisting these poor souls involved in significant accidents leaving them catastrophically injured so I had an idea of what I would be up against but because I always have faith in that all will resolve and because I always gave my 1000% by providing insurers all the goods, I thought smooth sailing for me as well—but NO. So, I am still battling it out, it is just so disappointing to say the least that we pay so much of our hard-earned money over the years, NEVER put in a claim for over thirty years, and because things are tough since COVID, you think, “I am insured all is good”—but NO. I pray that all will resolve for the highest good of all and all in good intention.

So here is the deal, here is why I am sharing this with you and my discovery of the “path of least resistance’, when the contractor, came out to inspect the area, he gave me a sermon and educated me on the flow of water taking the “path of least resistance” as it moved away from the tiled flooring and climbed up my walls leaving the lovely mold that now decorates my walls. To which I said “huh”. And guess what my sweet souls: insurers DO NOT PAY FOR MOLD. What I do know is that with water damage, mold is inevitable regardless of how many hours, days, weeks—but our lovely insurers have somehow snuck a clause that clears them from any mold damage—how do they get away with this? How do they sleep at night knowing they are taking millions of dollars from hard working people knowing that water damage and mold are part and parcel and somehow, they refuse to be liable for such damage? Well, my friends, this is my life right now, I know it could be worse—to which I am thankful that I am only dealing with materials and nothing else, but I could do without the frustration. So, my story continues with a lovely independent adjuster attending my home, who continued his inspection and repeated the sermon to me, of “water flow” and “the path of least resistance”. I noted it, screenshotted in my brain, and continued with my argument as to why this damage should be paid. This dispute led to a second contractor attending my home, this time a plumber. I told him that the previous contractor, who is an expert in mold removal, inspected the damage and this plumber quoted verbatim what the previous contractor would have said to me: blah, blah, blah…” path of least resistance”. So here I was, standing in the middle of my basement, just trying to get this resolved and hopefully have insurers consider payment seeing that it is water damage, and that they should pay, but most importantly I stood there thinking maybe I am going about life all wrong? Why am I placing obstacles where I should not? The universe is trying to reveal a life lesson to me, easy flow of money, and I am insisting on resisting it because I am wired this way, because it is the way I know how to make money, because it is the way it has always been. Work hard and you will get a cheque! But is this the way to true wealth? There are not enough hours in the day to make the amount of wealth I wish to make! Surely it is not possible? And then a light bulb sparks: water will flow in the path of least resistance. No, literally a light bulb did spark, as I changed my mom’s refrigerator bulb 😊. The light switch came on! My ‘aha’ moment. I get the lesson universe! What I choose to focus on, is exactly what I will attract to into reality. In other words, what I focus on, expands—flow.

As we know everything is energy. Guess what? Money is energy too. If we know money is energy, then money will flow in the path of least resistance. If I am busy worrying about money or wondering HOW I can get from here to there financially, I am blocking my flow of money. I am creating all these obstacles with my whys? who’s? how’s? The “why me?” Just as I trusted in healing my body after my nasty fall which I did quickly and effortless, so too, I began easing my trust about money flow. Money has never been my worry, I have always worked, spent, and it flowed. I do believe however, that more of it could have flowed, I just never put the focus on money more than I did the actual “working hard” part. To do and be my best. It was important to me—a promise I made to myself. What I discovered however, is that all the hard work, I put in was not for myself, but for others, and it earned others darn good money. The discipline, the focus, the hard work, help shape the person I am today, but it did not put extra cash in my pocket. So now, my focus is on me and who I am in this vast planet, my legacy, my being and how I want to feel, always with humility and a little more cash…why not? I deserve it! It is my birth right. The truth is: it is equally hard work letting go of resistance—to train your logical mind to stop creating obstacles where there are none. Feeling good must be the priority regardless of what is happening around you—what is happening for you and NOT at you.

As I was worked on my healing, I turned to a few meditation videos and some motivational videos all not surprisingly enough discussing “the path of least resistance”. It seems that every show I watched mentioned this phrase. The universe was doing its best to get my attention. One of the videos of course clarified for me “the path of least resistance” when it came to finances. (Now you are talking!) As I understand it: we are energy. We are magnets, we will attract that which we put focus on. When we focus on our desires, Source energy immediately creates it in our vortex—our energy field. To manifest our desires in the material world, we must align with Source energy and how do we do that? By following the path of least resistance. So, if we go around asking for more wealth it will only elude us when we start thinking thoughts of worry, fear, doubt—”how will I make this vast amount of money?” When we start placing doubt and question if we deserve this wealth? Judgment is another block—when we say things like: “No one should make that much money, it is not natural?” We must learn to hold ourselves accountable for our own “damns” in our water flow, our blocks, our rubble, that make our flow; choppy, hard, and sometime seem like an eternity to reach its destination—you =wealth.

To allow flow or get in the flow, you must shift your perspective. Forget your old views on how to earn an excellent income and replace it with this principle: manifesting money starts with the mind and belief system concerning wealth and money. We have created limited beliefs about money (and how we earn it) that we have internalized over time and accepted to be true in our lives, in what we see. If we accept money as energy and energy is accessible, unlimited supply of source energy that we can use as desired—this is a much easier way to form a healthy mindset necessary to acquire wealth. If you are stuck in the mindset that money is hard to come by and you must work extra hard to make loads of it, (which is limiting because of our beliefs and perception of linear time) that is not fun now, is it? Not only have you convinced yourself that it is hard to make money (not enough hours in the world could earn you the amount of wealth you wish), but you are also of the belief that when you earn it, you must save it and protect it because of how hard you worked to earn it. This keeps you trapped (in that hamster wheel) and blocking “the flow”. Whereas the wealthy have no problem in visualizing wealth; money they don’t yet have, they look at money they do have as a tool to acquire more wealth. So, while the rest of are squirreling away our money for a “rainy day”, the wealthy see their money pour down by the buckets, to more acquired wealth on rainy and sunny days.

The way I see it, we are headed towards an abundant world. Think of the speed technology has evolved and continues to evolve, each time, faster and faster. I read that every 18 months or so, computer processing speed doubles—as a result ecommerce has grown exponentially and will continue its massive growth over the next two decades. Everything is energy. We ask and we receive (with great speed at might add), so will our bodies and minds do the same: Ask and you will attract to your world that which you focus on at great speed. So, be careful what you focus on.

So how do I rewire what I already have put to work for me in the past?

Discipline – A disciplined mindset is the true formula to becoming a leader in every aspect of life.
Focus – I am the focus of my journey. I work on me, my mind, body, and soul—create a mantra to stay focused.
Dedication – Just as I devoted endless hours at a job while working for someone else, I will devote endless hours on myself to reveal a better version of me.
Determination – Always remain determined to learn.
Gratitude – Never underestimate the power of gratitude. Being grateful ignites passion, inspiration, it will make you more receptive to new opportunities.

Being in the flow, is surrendering to source energy. It is spending less time resisting, debating whether to indulge in behaviours and activities that don’t align with your values and goals. Whereas I once walked through the doors that opened for me with great determination, making things happen with great focus and discipline, I recognize that I am now the architect of my life, dreaming up worlds that I once thought impossible, I will now make possible—no matter what the universe decides should come my way (always for the better, even if I many not think so at the time). I will ride the wave of life, allowing and accepting the flow, allowing it to take me where it needs to just as long as I focus on me, that I am inspired each day, ensuring that I am experiencing joy every step of the way, always being grateful and loving me, loving life.

When you eliminate your abundance blocks, passion is what flows. Inspiration is the result, and this is not only in your professional life but in all aspects of life, it is not only about attracting financial wealth but what you most desire in all areas of your life. You will begin to experience sudden rushes of creative ideas and as creative ideas start to flow, you experience optimal work and life balance. You begin to see your life with clarity. As you start relaxing in the flow of success, you begin to attract financial abundance without resistance. You allow yourself to shift your perspective by embracing the mindset of “unlimited” power and “abundance” and your focus and discipline will be your drive to your optimal success in whatever you choose to focus on. Whether it be a loving relationship(s), optimal health and fitness, success in what you are passionate about. With dedication and determination anyone can push the boundaries of their comfort zone. By getting out of your own way and removing the subconscious obstacles that kept you from flying, from allowing the flow, you will attract easily and freely that which you so desire into your physical world. By becoming aware and eliminating old beliefs, emotions, practices that no longer serve us, will ease the flow—isn’t ‘easy’ what we all dream of, but fail at? If you have done the hard inner work of discipline, focus, determination and have dedicated your life to honoring yourself and being the best at what you do, then all you need going forward is the motivation to connecting to all the things you want, recognizing what each step, along the path, will ultimately give you: happiness. By taking the path of least resistance, removing, doubt, guilt, anger, fear and allowing yourself the experiences that better serve who you are will ultimately support the best version of yourself.

Stop the self-sabotage, as you surrender and experience these mind-shifts, and you become aware of the coincidences and opportunities that will continue to show up in your world effortless. As you accept your new reality that all things including financial abundance come easily and freely, you will feel empowered so too, will the people around you, friends, family will reap the rewards of such empowerment. This uplifting energy creates a wonderful ripple effect of prosperity and positivity and is this not what we wish in the world? So, my friends, as you align yourselves with source energy, and you are true to yourself, follow your path, listen to your inner voice, it will never steer you wrong—it will only bring you moments of happiness, joy and yes, abundance in the most peaceful and loving way!

There is a beautiful Sanskrit word I learned: Jyoti which means Light, Spiritual Force. While ignorance through resistance takes us through periods of darkness, and suffering, when we align ourselves with Source, Divine light, moves us beyond darkness with humility. Love, passion, inspiration is all we need to be in the “flow.”

You deserve to live a brilliant abundant life! Remember to stay humble and offer kindness, elevate everyone in your life, and those you have the opportunity and great privilege to meet today. Offer much love to your family and friends, give love and more love always, including your loyal and faithful pets!

Until our next visit together, stay kind and true to yourself.

To the beautiful, powerful you,

The Classic Do-over

Posted on July 13, 2021 by Ana Spano under Inspiring, Motivation, Self-development, self-help, Uncategorized, well-being, Wellness

“I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the morning.”—J. B. Priestly

When we are young, we are so full of energy, we are invincible, we think we have all the time in the world, our skin is supple—we thrive! We run carefree, convincing ourselves we can do anything, the world is our playground (or at least our back and front yards were😊). We dream worlds but somewhere along, as responsibility sets in, we tell ourselves a different story and we eject the wings that once had us flying and forget to dream. As we get into our forties it hits us: “I ‘shoulda’, ‘coulda’, ‘woulda’. But why didn’t I?” It seems life has a way of playing a cruel joke on us, giving us all the energy and vibrancy, early on in our lives when we do not know what we want for ourselves. Our stories may even take away our confidence early on, so we now have loads of energy and no confidence—bummer☹. I would say, it is around ‘forty’, and we have lived a few years, that we shift our perspectives, we gain our confidence—or we simply don’t care at this point what others think and we begin to speak our mind, and go after the things we should have when we were younger; except for most, we lack the energy or we convince ourselves “our ship has long since sailed”, we talk ourselves once again out of that ‘dream’ that must only remain…a dream buried in the ashes of the past. Life would be perfect if we could meet somewhere in the middle. To have our youthful looks, vibrant youthful energy—where there is no room for awkward and embarrassing, to relive a day, that pivotal moment in our life, where we choose different, we choose to fix problems steering our current life in a different direction. But is different better? Will it change what we see in the mirror?

Hello my beautiful souls! Welcome back! I hope you are continuing to keep safe, soon this will all be behind us, and I cannot wait to finally see beautiful smiles once more—something I deeply miss, for now we continue to do our part and keep practicing safety. So how about it? Would you welcome a do-over in your life? I do not know why this theme, kept popping up for me these past few weeks, so I decided to write about it—perhaps it may be a reoccurring theme in our collective minds, born from the darkness that is our present, these unusual times, having us locked up for too long and our wheels on overdrive, thinking, wondering, daydreaming—”what if”? I have no regrets in life. I was student council president, I was quite outgoing (and still am), I spoke my mind, always. I have always been playful, but life has a way of pausing you. OK, the personality was there, the confidence was there, but I chose to marry young, so life took my dreams in a different direction. As my perspectives shift, I see my narrative starting from the end and working my way backwards—to catch up to my past and continue where I left of—does this make sense? I did not marry young to have kids, I married my high school sweetheart and managed to get that check mark, together we worked hard and paid off our mortgage at a young age ✅ check. I eventually had the kids; two beautiful intelligent young women ✅check, I did the career thing ✅check but what is missing? Perhaps it is the fulfillment thing…that is missing. Life will have you believe, you missed out, that perhaps you messed up along the way, or if you had chosen a different path, it might have been better, but that is not always true, is it? It all depends on your expectations and your perception of what that “perfect ideal” life looked like from the perspective of your adolescent mind. What picture did you hold for yourself? How did you view your life unfolding? Is the current mundane, stagnancy in life getting you down? And you know what I think of expectations—they do not do us any good, so toss it! This is when we should get in touch with our goals once again, to offer a little inspiration and much needed motivation. Yes, we might have to rethink our goals as they might have changed since our priorities are constantly changing as we ride the wave of life, our perspectives change so we replace what no longer serves us and find a new dream! It is time to get out of our heads and think with our hearts just like we did when we were kids—only participating in those activities that bring us joy. We did not waste time thinking how we were going to spend time; we just ran towards our joyful moment only following our heart. The important thing is to work on how we wish to feel the next thirty, forty, fifty years from now. Forget your old hurts, pains, regrets and open your heart—live there for awhile. Just feel LOVE in a new kind of way, the way you dreamed it would feel. Feel JOY, be in its constant state of childish play, carefree, vibrant energy.

Life may not offer us a do-over, and as for a reset button we can only keep looking, but it certainly offers us plenty of opportunities to make better tomorrows. That is the beauty of life—you get one! There is no wrong or right way, you are meant to experience it all! Mistakes, embarrassing moments, moments of sadness, failures, joys, laughter, success to experience it fully! As we participate, as we embrace, we learn, we grow, with each experience, we become a little wiser, knowing what we like or don’t. When we experience it fully, we learn to embrace the moment, embrace change, learn from it, and move on—this is how emotions come to be. As our perspectives shift, we start inviting into our world different things, different experiences, stirring up different emotions. By nature, I am an individual who rarely tries new products, I am a: “Why fix what ain’t broke”, kinda person. Do not get me wrong, I am very open-minded to experiences and things, but when it comes to products, maybe it is something I cannot bother to try the alternative. Maybe some things are meant to remain, and that is my thing—my version of permanence in my life. I am ready to go off into the world and experience it all but leave my products alone😊. My husband on the other hand loves trying new products and on the rare occasion he goes grocery shopping, he will come home with a new product…what?? In most cases, I will like the product, but I will continue to buy my old brand and combine the two—that’s me 😜. Is it the familiar thing? Is my mind not ready to let go of the old? My husband, will however, have a hard time inviting new experiences in his life, he has difficulty with change in that respect—do not invite new emotions it does not go well with his anxiety, but he is learning to allow and accept change and understands that it is good. So maybe, it is a good thing that for most of us, we get to make the bigger decisions later in life, when we know better (at least we think we do). There is that contradiction (in life) I talked about: “Follow your heart but don’t give into emotion when making a decision;” “Go and make your tomorrows happen but be patient, be still and allow the fates to intervene.” Huh? I know, no wonder the majority feel lost—not knowing which way to go. I guess what I am trying to share with you is that the best decisions are made with an awareness of what you are getting yourself into, patience with yourself and a whole lot of accountability. To tackle life and go into it knowing the repercussions of some of those decisions and be willing to accept them as experiences necessary, be ready to hold yourself accountable for those repercussions so that if something does not turn out, you are not blaming everyone else but yourself. And by “knowing better”, I am not necessarily referring to, intelligent decisions (that’s boring), no what I am referring to is: the feeling behind the task at hand. Think about it: if you have lived forty years of your life and you have engaged in personal, and professional relationships, you have engaged in life in general—you must have a fairly good idea of what you liked or did not like from those experiences—so why repeat it? Embrace the perfections and imperfections—it is all relevant, it all has a purpose. How would you know to not want relive a moment or want a particulare thing in your life, if you did not already live it, if you did not already experience it?

“The more value you add to the lives of others, the more valuable you become to them.”—Hal Elrod

When you make it your mission in life to fill yourself up of all that is good, a good heart, kindness, love, peace, joy, then your outer world will only reflect that which you have inside. It is not the other way around. You must never think that once your outer world changes, then you will start feeling better about yourself. Do not fall into that misguided perception that you will only feel good, that you will achieve happiness when your outer world is good. As we get to experience the “good” and “bad” moments in life, the emotions born from those moments and we become a little wiser, we start filling our shopping carts with things that are of more value instead of things that temporarily fix our mood. Our younger selves loved filling our carts with ‘crap’, with senseless ‘stuff’ we thought would fill our hearts and would make us happy. Now we are a little older, much wiser—all that stuff no longer serves us. We begin to understand that materials are wonderful to have but they certainly do not fill us, they keep us wanting and needing more, always. As we acquire our large and small ‘stuff’, we forget to be grateful along the way. Forgetting this small but impactful practice of expressing gratitude and appreciation for all experiences including the smallest of moments, is what keeps us in the ‘need’ always striving for more in our lives, that is not always on the positive. When we fill ourselves with love, peace, joy and feelings of gratitude, that can only come from loving experiences, family, loving friends, that add value to our lives, then the materials become less significant—your narrative then becomes more of, “How may I serve? How may I bring more value to my life, and those I love?” When you are full of love and gratitude, your heart is open—you become a magnet attracting more of the good that is currently filling you; abundance, love—love for yourself and your loved ones. Many aspects of life can leave us feeling overwhelmed, trapped at times. When we pivot our thoughts, and learn to stay the course, trusting the process, allowing life to do its thing, always participating, embracing the flow, we learn to enjoy doing life, no matter what it has in store for us. Remember life happens for you NOT at you.

Our thoughts have a way of creating an illusion, often fear based—a way ego keeps us from realising our potential, our body soon follows and begins to operate from a survival mode, the body then becomes the mind and emotion. As we live the mundane, the responsible life, we forget to feed our minds new dreams, new thoughts, new emotions—we get stuck, our bodies then work from reaction mode, the subconscious level of whatever emotion you fed it in the past: anger, frustrations, fear, resentment, pain, suffering. If your body continues to function from this subconscious level long enough—this is when illness materialises into your present. Bitterness is what keeps you from flying. It is also, what keeps you living in the past—an illusion you created that was probably your perception of a “better life” than the one you are currently living, or a memory of a made-up future you thought was right for you. When we remove the imaginary constraints, we ourselves create, we no longer feel beaten, we remove the walls around us, we worked so hard to put up because of fear, because we gave a person, place, or a moment (high or low) more credit than ourselves. It is time to break that fictitious ceiling, do not give it power in letting you believe what you do not deserve, what is rightfully yours—that something is beyond your reach, be “the more” in your life. Do the deed, be fully present and detach from outcomes. Instead, let constraints be the force that drives you to your next dream, your next goal.

Allow me to continue with our shopping cart analogy, what shall we fill it with? What will make me happy right now? As I navigate the streets of my little town, I realise I am not driving a ‘G-Wagon’, but I have a car ✅check. I have never been a Mercedes-Benz ‘kinda gal’, but that ‘G-Wagon’ sure looks sweet! No, it will not bring me joy, but it will put a smile on my face as I take a drive around the film district in Toronto, with all their high-end boutiques and fine dining😊. Something to work towards, maybe my taste will change in the next five to ten years. I mentioned I have a mortgage-free house, that certainly is sweet. I have done some traveling, mostly the Caribbean. I know, I know right…not a bad life. My shopping cart is still empty except for the G-Wagon that is perhaps a maybe, but my heart is full.

Throughout, I have kept my body somewhat fit. I have never made weight an issue, so it is not. My health is optimal because what I put my attention to, I will attract in my life. Whatever I give energy to and attention to will come back to me. Why give what I do not want, energy? My experiences create emotion, and I know emotion is energy in motion, it is fluid—it is energy moving through my body, meant to be felt and released, so I stay focused on the good. My positive outlook on life takes care of that for me. I am always full of positive energy, and I am convinced that this energy is what keeps me healthy and fit, always burning the excess I do not need in every aspect of my life that includes stress. I exercise in the morning releasing all the good endorphins and dopamine elevating me to my highest good, and I eat what I want. I could enhance my diet with some healthier choices. I am working on it. I recognize that I want this body to last me for many more years to come, so I must do better—accountability ✅ check. My body is my vehicle that keeps me mobile, taking me wherever I need to go, independently, so I must keep it in check. I gain a healthy check mark on health and fitness although I will ensure to do more—there is always room for improvement! Holding yourself accountable for your choices in life is key. Do the deed, recognise it needs to get done, and enjoy doing it! When you learn to view limitations as a driving force, striving for success in whatever you choose to do, giving up is never an option. Let’s not stop at fitness goals, what life goals do you have? Not having money is no excuse—make your miracles, opportunities are always surrounding us to make us better in business, as individuals, you just need to decide that you want them, failure is the opportunity to begin again—reach beyond your grasp—life certainly has a way of rewarding you.

Having a corporate life was fun and I was deep into it for over thirty years. I learned a lot, my bosses were never my mentors as it turned out, but they certainly made work life interesting, and that’s OK, life is my eternal mentor. Always revealing itself to me, teaching me to put in the hard work, keep planting seeds and you will get rewarded, life tells me. Life has taught me and continues to teach me that kindness will open many doors. All you must do is show up every day, support others, surround yourself with good people, and the universe will be kind and generous with you. Never take anything personal, we are all learning here, take the lesson learned and move on. I will say with certainty that I gave my 1000%, always gave more value than my worth, I have no regrets, I stayed in the corporate scene until it no longer brought me joy. Love is the secret. Love for your work, love for your peers and love for yourself, loving what you do, loving life and who you are in it, that is the engine that will keep you going full steam ahead. Working in the legal sector had its challenges but nothing compares to married life. Now marriage is hard work—no one said it would be easy, nurturing your relationship is key, pour a lot of love into it, and it will not disappoint. Life throws many challenges, you must learn to keep your head above water, grow from the punches, face it full force, just learn to breathe and together—enjoy the ride, enjoy the journey! I should know, I have enjoyed thirty wonderful years with my high school sweetheart! Sure, it was hard in the beginning, with our different views, different cultures and it got even messier when we threw kids in the mix. But here we are with two beautiful girls, one graduated ‘with honors and distinction’ and her younger sister, on her way there, having made her way on the Dean’s list already just entering her third year of university. This is our pay off! This is what we put our heart, sweat and tears and the universe has a way of rewarding us! Nice fat check mark under family ✅ check! So, nothing to add to my cart but the G-Wagon so far and my heart continues to be full.

I may not have all the zeros in my bank account as I would hope for, but I have done quite well for myself, and I still have my sanity—that is a big fat ✅ check! So, what is it that most of us look for? Why is it that most think they have missed out on? What are you hoping to find in those finance magazines? An even better question to ask is: “What will you do when you accumulate all the zeros in your bank account?” Do not get me wrong there is nothing wrong in going after financial abundance, heck it is wonderful to attain financial freedom but who do you hope to become? Do you love who you are now? Do you hope to love yourself even more? Do you hope to love more?” So, maybe you do not own a car, but you are able to get around, and maybe you have money for transit or transportation in whatever form (Hey it beats paying for gas, insurance, and maintenance.). If you wish to join us insurance payers, don’t worry you’ll get there just set the right goals, it is never too late😊. Maybe you are married, you are busy being mommy, caregiver, balancing a job, and you somehow forgot yourself along the way. You became mommy to everyone including your partner, what happened? Or maybe you married your sweet-heart that stole your heart all those years ago, which is great, you lost your nerve along the way and now you are 40, 50, still sitting in that cubicle—not the expectation you had for yourself, huh? What happened? You both forgot to continue to dream, to re-draft your goals, and map out new ones, but there is still time. There is always time to become more, to add more value to this hurting world. The universe always offers an opportunity to check-in, checking out should never be an option. Familiar is wonderful. To have a life-long partner, someone that knows all your quirks, who makes you laugh, and is there to hold your hand and catch you when you fall. Why would you give that up? Because guess what? when you finally make it—it will all be worth it in the end. The late nights, the tears, the hurts, the sacrifices, the pains, the bumpy roads, all shared together as family—the value of family is priceless! Marriage should never be about losing yourself but becoming more together, it is about finding more of ourselves. But this is where familiar should end. To live a fulfilled life, different must be your new norm—to think greater than how you feel. You see what I mean about contradictions—you must learn to navigate through them, knowing when to apply, when to sail, when to change course. Stop being addicted to the same emotions, the same experiences because you will only continue to create the same predictable future. Do not wait for tragedy to strike before you decide to begin to make necessary changes, invite wonderful challenges, invite different, to live a joy-filled and inspired life.

So, maybe there is no reset button, but we could all benefit from a little pause, take the time to reflect, inspect our wins, our losses, our triumphs our mishaps, take the lessons learned and look forward to better tomorrows. That is what COVID did to us, it offered us a moment of ‘pause’. To take a moment to think about what you were doing right before the world stopped. What were you doing, where were you headed? What did you think was happening at you? Maybe you were in a dead-end job, hiding behind a pile of paper, never allowing yourself to realise your true potential. Maybe success got all the checks, but you were not allowing for the necessary pauses in life, to check in with yourself, to appreciate the little things, including family. As we go about our lives, we tend to tell many different versions of our stories—those we tell ourselves and those we tell or show others. These pauses in life, show us to embrace all the imperfections in our lives, perfectly woven in our stories that only serve to add more value to our experiences here in this lifetime—to be more than you were. Our losses, our challenges, perfectly placed, divinely timed, to offer us strength, light after dark. Learning to love ‘the you’, after darkness, after challenges, after brokenness. We only gain the gifts of trust, faith, love, humility when we experience life through our authenticity and in this authenticity, we experience life in its truest, rawest, form embracing its imperfections never questioning it. When we learn to live our authentic lives, we experience exponential growth, a growth that only comes from trusting the flow. You stop resisting life, resisting change, taking on the challenges as badges of honor to be worn, unveiling a better version of yourself—one of more value, always.

You get one life, live it fully and completely! We have choices in life, learn to lead with your heart and fill yourself with beauty, love, peace, kindness. Your soul has the map to your destiny it will only reflect to you what you put into it. What was meant for you will always be there until you are ready to tap into it—opportunities will never pass you by. When you look for wonderful things, you will only find more of them. Your inner world must be filled with what you want to see in the world. Learn to let go of the chaos that surrounds you and go within. Learn to let go of illusions placed there by your material mind, by ego, and learn to listen to your heart. Do not go chasing success or a version of success because you feel that is what you should do or because society says so or because of a false perception says it’s the way. Breathe, dig deep connect with your heart and do what you love, success is a by-product of that love, of that force. When I have a pressing question and don’t know which way to go, I will close my eyes, and listen to my heart. I will ask the question and feel what is right for me. If feelings of frustration, anger, feelings of being overwhelmed come forth, then I know that it is not for me. If faced with a new experience and feelings of peace, joy, butterflies, fire in my belly, excitement overtakes me—then it is right. Life gives you plenty of opportunities to re-invent yourself, pivot, and live your best life in the truest form. Live it for you, not for everyone else. Life has taught me that I must like my own company, I like to sleep with the person that I am, no matter who sleeps beside me. I laugh, I love, I give more of myself, always.

Maybe now is the time, you take that leap of faith into that relationship you longed for, or that career opportunity you thought you were not good enough for, maybe today is the day you learn to look past your selfish needs and go after your true desires, that dream that keeps you up at night, learn to let go of needing things into your life and place your focus on your wants, dreams, desires that fill your heart and soul! You see, it is never about a do-over, it is about seizing moments. There is no right or wrong, if it was meant for you and you dreamed it, it is never too late—your dream life is simply waiting for you so step into it! So maybe you did not get to publish your first book at the age of 20 or even 30, perhaps 50 or 60 is more of what the universe had in mind for you. Ronald Reagan best said it in his quote: “There are no constraints on the human mind, no walls around the human spirit, no barriers to our progress except those we ourselves erect.” Stop spending your days chasing your moments, be in the moment and let your moments, your successes chase you. There is no other place to be, then here and now. Embrace it! Recognise that whatever happened in your life or is happening, needed to happen and unfold in the manner that it did. If you are not feeling joy right now, it is simply time for you to go back to drawing table and re-draft a new dream, shift your perspective, and see what the wizard has in store for you! Enjoy your freedom if you have it, read, write, dance, create! Enjoy your children, partners, pets—it’s all good😊, but the secret to a well lived life is that you enjoy whatever you have the privilege and opportunity in life to do! Do not get lost in your head, with thoughts of “what-ifs” and “needs” or perceptions of what you think the “perfect” life is; visions placed by your inexperienced mind. You have lived a few moments since then, a few tears, a few joys—so what do you want to feel right now? How has your life experience enhanced that future joy, that future love, has it added value to your life?

In writing this blog, like many writers, you experience moments of enlightenment, that help elevate your writing with that personal touch so that your audience is so much more engaged, intrigued by your personal experiences allowing for that connectedness that I often talk about. When you begin to view the world from this perspective, connecting to person, experiences, places, it is when you learn to act from compassion and empathy, you no longer view yourself as separate. You embrace all moments as experiences necessary for your growth. On this very writing journey, I had a moment of pause, my peace was interrupted with a moment of bringing awareness to my present being. As my town began to re-open businesses that had been shut for a few months, I decided I wanted to venture out of my cave and safely allow myself for what I thought was much needed shopping time (mostly for my girls) having summer upon us it would be nice to embrace it with summer dresses and to also offer my support to the community. It turns out, the universe had something else planned, and what should have been a joyful shopping spree, turned out to be a painful afternoon of licking wounds and an inability to sit, sneeze or laugh. I suffered a significant fall on my way, knocking the wind out of me and leaving me incapacitated for more than a week. Suffering significant bruises as my patches of honor, on my upper thigh, contusions to my ribs and my entire upper left side including lungs were inflamed and unbearable to touch. Oh yeah, it was pretty bad; a senseless fall, its ramifications begging for my attention. This was my pause; this was my moment to learn to sit still and allow others for once take care of me—something I seldom accept. To put myself higher on my list of priorities.

Canada is said to have two climates when driving, the challenges of winter driving and construction season☹. Summer is here and construction begins. I may start on one road, but ten minutes in, be told, you must detour. So, I pack a lot of patience, water, and wonderful music to enjoy my unplanned excursions. As I drive along, I notice some beautiful homes I never seen before, maybe some parks and wonderful people walking their pets—a wonderful site. Once you learn to relax and become ONE with life, the unraveling will stop and you will soon realise that all the hiccups, the missteps, the aches, the tears were necessary to bring value, to make you more valuable—a sacred loving nurturing gem, to appreciate moments that much more. You see, it is never about what you think you missed out on, but what you found instead. Choices made by you, a path leading you to more value, more memorable moments. If you had a different vision of what you currently see in the mirror, then pivot your thoughts, change the narrative starting from within, soon your outworld will reflect at you what you wish to see in your physical world. Once you stop the illusion of denial, lacks and limitations—stories told by you, and put on the lens that shows you that wisdom comes at a high price but leaves you empowered ready to take on life with clarity and acceptance, living in joy. If you keep looking down at that half-empty glass, you will miss out what the universe is revealing to you now! Let go of your struggle, stop living in the past and immerse yourself in this experience, be opened to receiving what is yours—you just need faith and trust in the flow!

So where does that leave my cart? Let’s just say the G-Wagon will be on my wish-list under want category and “fun I deserve” in the not-too-distant future because why not? In life, once you have done all the hard work, recognising time is the most precious gift, you allow yourself the gifts of truths, humbleness and yes, you allow your wants to become your needs because you deserve it! I don’t really need a G-Wagon but it will be a fun replacement for my past Toyota and Mazda moments and experiences. They certainly served their purpose, offering space for diapers, baby furniture and endless toys, and yes, babies, they were the smart economic decisions made by two very naïve unsuspecting parents. They housed, the joys, the tears, the “for sures” and bumps and bruises along the way, the “I’m all in” moments. This new dream—I will keep under ‘fun’, exciting, beautifully disguised and dynamic—one of value in my journey of self discovery, a decision made by a very present me.

So, it is not about a do-over or a reset in life, it is about making choices and liking the choices you make because you have to live with it. Never fall for the: “You get one chance in life so make it right”, no, you get one life—live it with all the rights, wrongs, messiness, imperfections and successes—embrace it all! Life is a chaos and amid that chaos and all the randomness; it never fails to surprise you; an unexpected event occurs thrusting you forward, leaving you breathless, just be sure to be present every step of the way—the key is having no regrets. Sometimes life will slow down just enough and remind us we are all connected fate always working its magic letting you know you grew into the individual you were always meant to be. Every morning is the start of a new day, your opportunity for a do-over, to start anew to add more value than the day before. You deserve to live a brilliant abundant life! Go live it! Invite uncondition love into your life, into your world, it will never disapoint!

Remember to stay humble and offer kindness, elevate everyone in your life, and those you have the opportunity to meet today. Offer much love to yourself, family and friends, give love and more love always, including your loyal and faithful pets!

Until our next visit together, stay kind and true to yourself.

To the beautiful, powerful you,

Perspectives of A Writer

See the World Differently

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